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Sunday, December 6, 2009

Overcome Shyness Through Self Help

Posted by patrick

By Hans S Delane

For people who are extremely shy, the idea of talking to new people makes them quite nervous. The moment you think about it, there is a churn in your stomach. Serious shyness has a potential for deep impact on the social activities of people. At some point in time, millions of people suffer from a disease called social anxiety. There is a remedy for this disorder which is called cognitive behavioral treatment.

Earlier on, scientists used to attribute the family environment to the emotional growth and development of a child. Now it appears that nature has programmed people's personality towards being shy. This disorder is overcome by many people, while at the same time, a number of them actually live with it till their old age. Today's generation lives in a world which needs less social contact and therefore this contributes to the underdeveloped social conditioning of some people. Internet and its related aspects like email interaction and computer based games, lead to risk of people becoming less social. If you happen to suffer from this disorder, there are a number of things you can do to overcome it.

First and foremost, identify what triggers shyness. Every situation does not lead to shyness in all the people. What time do you feel anxious? Ask yourself the question about when do you feel shy. Do you have negative thoughts and predictions automatically? Before you start believing that the negative assumption you are making is fact, try and challenge your thought process.

As a shy person, start thinking that the thought in your mind is only a guess. Do not focus too much on thoughts that confirm your anxiety. Start shifting your thoughts to something which disapproves it. One cannot please everyone at the same time.

Summon your guts to face the situation head on. Exposure is the best way to fight it since you yourself place yourself in situations where you encounter anxiety and shyness. Start facing your fears repeatedly so that you become accustomed to them, which will eventually lessen the grip and disappear. The end objective should be start facing the what you fear the most so that it appears simple to you. Even though, this may lead to hiccups in the beginning but it is a good idea to start doing it as soon as possible. Do not delay this as it will lead to more challenges for you.

Shyness happens to be a personality characteristic and not a psychological imbalance or disorder. It has varying degrees of shyness. Some people simply can't face crowd and then there are some who want to live like hermits, totally cut off from the world. That's not the way one should be living their life. Some shy people treat shyness as a cocoon. The cocoon provides them warmth, quietness and aloofness. At the same time, it is very dark, lonely and confining.

It is a good idea to get help from family and friends. During difficult times, they will provide you with pointers and support. It becomes quite easy and comforting, when you know that you have someone who will support you during difficult period. Soon you will realize that your fears are getting overcome. By the time you attain a social life, you will realize that how easy it is to be there and met people.

One now has many remedies to minimize shyness. Start taking one step a day or week, which will ensure that shyness turns out to be history. One can try a lot of other things as well, but these pointers can help you get to the right direction.

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