Lies and Love
Posted by
patrick
During this holiday season, many find themselves without someone to enjoy the festivities with. Options are endless; there are parties galore and various opportunities for cozy times with that special someone. There are many opportunities at hand for those that are single to date or attend singles events. This brings us to the subject of expectations. As I have mentioned in previous blogs the dating process is not for the faint of heart. It is important to go into this arena with the right attitude. I have heard so many horror stories from friends, family, and acquaintances of the trials and tribulations of dating. (Especially internet dating!) In order to travel this treacherous and yet wonderful path of meeting and greeting, which can be both exciting and nerve-racking, one must enter the entire process with the right attitude.
Lets start with internet dating. This process certainly begins with expectations. I was talking to a male friend of mine the other evening and he had a particularly on the mark view of how this dating drill needs to go. From this perceptive males point of view, too many people begin the process with expectations that lead them down the slippery hill into dating hell. He believes that if you spend more time than two phone conversations before you actually meet, that you then fall into the jaws of the false expectations pit by building up in your mind a fantasy person. Although internet photos are exchanged and some of your deepest, darkest secrets are exposed to one another, you still have no clue who you are really dealing with until you meet face to face. My male friends answer to this false expectation dilemma is that one must absolutely meet if not for anything more than a cup of coffee and a half hour of each others time by the end of the second phone conversation.
With busy work schedules for both men and women, long distance relationships have become more popular. A good friend met a guy online and after countless emails and phone calls they just had to meet each other. After all of their conversation on the phone and via email she thought he was different, but by the end of their day together he was acting cold because she would not go back to his hotel room. To his dismay, no exotic holiday cupcakes on the menu that evening. The evening will go down in history as one of her most distasteful dating experiences ever. What were the red flags for dating disaster here? In this case, both parties expectations failed. She was expecting a well-educated gentleman; he was expecting a POA (piece of ass).
Dating is an exercise to get to know new people, it is imperative that you properly portray yourself and let the other individual know your agenda for the relationship. By being upfront with the other person it starts a good foundation for a relationship that will hopefully blossom over time. As long as you know that you have truthfully posted recent and accurate photos (both parties), are within three years of your actual age posted online, and don't have a current or ex-lover in your closet at home you should be able to enjoy this wonderful season with a date or two that wont end up in the Guinness Book of Records for worst holiday date ever.
Lets start with internet dating. This process certainly begins with expectations. I was talking to a male friend of mine the other evening and he had a particularly on the mark view of how this dating drill needs to go. From this perceptive males point of view, too many people begin the process with expectations that lead them down the slippery hill into dating hell. He believes that if you spend more time than two phone conversations before you actually meet, that you then fall into the jaws of the false expectations pit by building up in your mind a fantasy person. Although internet photos are exchanged and some of your deepest, darkest secrets are exposed to one another, you still have no clue who you are really dealing with until you meet face to face. My male friends answer to this false expectation dilemma is that one must absolutely meet if not for anything more than a cup of coffee and a half hour of each others time by the end of the second phone conversation.
With busy work schedules for both men and women, long distance relationships have become more popular. A good friend met a guy online and after countless emails and phone calls they just had to meet each other. After all of their conversation on the phone and via email she thought he was different, but by the end of their day together he was acting cold because she would not go back to his hotel room. To his dismay, no exotic holiday cupcakes on the menu that evening. The evening will go down in history as one of her most distasteful dating experiences ever. What were the red flags for dating disaster here? In this case, both parties expectations failed. She was expecting a well-educated gentleman; he was expecting a POA (piece of ass).
Dating is an exercise to get to know new people, it is imperative that you properly portray yourself and let the other individual know your agenda for the relationship. By being upfront with the other person it starts a good foundation for a relationship that will hopefully blossom over time. As long as you know that you have truthfully posted recent and accurate photos (both parties), are within three years of your actual age posted online, and don't have a current or ex-lover in your closet at home you should be able to enjoy this wonderful season with a date or two that wont end up in the Guinness Book of Records for worst holiday date ever.
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