Self Help Infos

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Thursday, April 16, 2009

How To Get My Husband Back And Avoid Divorce

Posted by patrick

By Nikki Frost

We were having a successful, happy marriage, and everything seemed so perfect, But one day, out of the blue, Jim, my husband, said, "Honey, I think I want a divorce". I was shocked! I had to figure out how to get my husband back before he finalized the divorce.

As I search for help, these are some of the lessons I learned:

In figuring out how to win my husband back, I came to realize that although I still loved him, I needed to keep my pride in check and not let him get the better of me. Sometimes, during a separation it is a good idea not to give into him too easily, but play hard to get, and show him that he is the big loser here, not you.

As you figure out how to get husband back, and you notice he still has feelings for you, then try start up a conversation with him. But keep it casual and avoid getting too emotional, because you want him to feel he and enough space and time to think about the situation. So if you plan on contacting him by phone, email or text message, then keep it brief in reminding him what he is missing out on, without smothering him.

And if you are patient enough and give him the space he needs, he may start to open up to you, and allow you to show him how good the marriage has been. When I learned how to get my husband back, I avoided bringing up the bad memories or telling him how crazy he was to consider divorce. If I had, it would have lowered my chances of regaining his affection.

If your husband gives no reaction to the memories you tell him about, then don't give up hope just yet. It could either mean he has lost chemistry with you, or that he needs more time to think about the relationship, so give him all the time he needs. But, if he does react and shows some signs of interest in you, then keep on bring up those good memories and remind why he needs this marriage, until you get husband back.

As I learned how to win my husband back and notice his signs of interest or affection towards me, I began to let him know how I felt about divorce. I expressed my feelings and thoughts with him, but not in a weak, clingy, needy way. When you notice your husband showing signs of renewed interest, then tell him exactly how you feel, and see how he responds. If his body language tells you no, then take a step back and do not try force the issue.

When my husband separated from me, and considered getting a divorce, the above steps are what I followed in learning how to get my husband back. If your marriage is breaking down, then try these things out, and also look for other solid advice. But what is important, is that you stay strong and never give up, talk to your husband about working out your differences, and use divorce only as a last resort.

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